Sunday, 23 July 2017

Lucy's on a Skyweaver

Diamond Geezer, Get Serious.

With diamonds, being the obvious implication. Because Harlequins? And they have diamonds? Is this getting through at all?


Friday, 7 July 2017

3:10 Tau Yuma


Hi! Kraken is away on holiday, but that doesn't mean we, his paintbrushes, are.

Sunday, 2 July 2017

For the Greater Gangrene - T'au vs Nurgle Chaos Host

By my depleted leucocytes!
It's All Skype Fight Night!


The lure of 40K is hard upon me. The itch! I must scratch!

Oh no, wait, it's just the symptoms of early onset Nurgle's Rot. Great.

Kraken here, along with Kasfunatu, battling via remote as we bring you a 40K matched play report. As a representative of the Greater Good, I shall be commanding the T'pau sept.





Wednesday, 28 June 2017

Dungeon Bashing


Okay, Mantic, let's talk final scores.

Image result for dungeon saga
What? There are DS heroes we haven't painted?

Sunday, 25 June 2017

40K: To Punch an Alien

In the Grim Darkness of the Fortyfirst Millenium
I still buy plastic crack

Image result for grim darkness


Behold! Two men in their forties playing an appropriate game!

Heh, I am still in my thirties for a little while longer.

Damn you, ageless Kasfunatu!

I am Kraken; age has not wearied me, nor the years condemned. Twelve of the buggers, I think, since last I ventured into these waters. Well, not really, it's basically Age of Sigmar with guns, and I venture out into those waters all the time. But I'm allowed to celebrate a little. All these 40K models I've painted, and nary a game in all this time.

So hurrah! Break out the bolters and burn yourselves a heretic, we're back in business, boys!


Thursday, 22 June 2017

Terrarium


Reptile week here, for some reason.


X-Wing: NorraRey vs Missile Spam

Having just returned from the US, I was searching for jetlag cure and an evening's entertainment. Step in Kraken and another scum list.



Think Kraken, think Scum. That's what I'm aiming for with this series of Xwing games, and I won't stop until we become synonymous.

Monday, 19 June 2017

What's That You Saih?

99% of my collection may be boxed up in storage, but a brave few models have escaped the all-encompassing bubble-wrap, like the Fellowship fleeing Khazad-dûm.


Nothing but single-figure updates for the foreseeable. So let's start with the Mistweaver Saih!

Saturday, 17 June 2017

Armies On The Move


Mistakes were made.

Friday, 16 June 2017

PowerXtreme


Man and machine!


Thursday, 15 June 2017

Warlord of Galahir: Soiled Goods

Our last foray into the Galahir! Save the merchant! Grab the loot! Kill the warlord! Increase productivity! Be happy!

A report from Dungeon Saga, Warlord of Galahir - Mission 6: I Believe These Are Mine.

As usual, Kraken, Leofa and Stylus (me) played over Skype. And to judge by the mission's introduction, we're not the only ones phoning it in.

Saturday, 10 June 2017

X Wing - Gonk Prince vs Strike 3


Image result for nice star wars pictures

It's been a while, but there was time last weekend for a little SkypeWing between myself (Kraken) and General Kas.

I've missed a good space battle; glad to be back on the mat. 


Speccy Ops


Infiltration!


Friday, 9 June 2017

Slambo II: Dried Blood

Movies these days ... you've only just seen one, and then they bring out a sequel.

ADRIAAAAAAAAAAAN!
Let's meet the Cash to this Tango.

Wednesday, 7 June 2017

EXT: The Old King's Astrolabe


Summertime, and the paintin' is easy


Warlord of Galahir: A Spell in the Clink

Dungeon Saga, Warlord of Galahir - Mission 5: Visiting Time.

Back to jail for this lot. 

Tuesday, 6 June 2017

EXT: Southern Ruins


Welcome to summer, Sigmarites!

Monday, 5 June 2017

Smeltdown: Ironjawz vs Disciples of Tzeentch

The Ark of Alternatives was unfolding like a tangram flower. Complex panels of engraved and enamelled bone shifted slowly through the air as the Tzeentchian choir chanted and hummed around it. Sparks of blue and pink light snapped and crackled from piece to piece. Already, you could hardly tell it had been a box at all.

What would it become? 

"Magister!" 

The apologetic acolyte was clearly reluctant to intrude. Zonaranoz, chief Magister of the Tzeentchian Throng, waved his apologies aside - if this was important enough for the acolyte to enter during the days-long ritual, it would have to be heard. 

"The greenskins have returned, and in greater numbers!" 

Zonaranoz sighed. "Hardly startling. It is their way. Very well. Muster the guard, we shall drive them off once more."

"But Magister, our guard! They are so few, and the orcs are many!"

Zonaranoz made a complex gesture, and the three nearest candelabra in the room flared with coruscating light. The heavy brass twisted, melting and bulging into new shapes. Within moments, a trio of Flamers writhed in place, guttering fire spilling from their boneless jaws. 

"Then we must create more," Zonaranoz said, smiling. "Come hither, boy. I shall show you a new rite, your very own transformation ahead of the great Day of Change. You shall become more powerful than you ever expected! You shall behold the Vortex, and become its bearer!"

The acolyte smiled nervously, but followed. Zonaranoz felt serene. The choir could manage without him for a time, and the creation of a Mutalith was always enjoyable. 

This should be fun.


Age of Sigmar battle report: Border War' between Orruk Ironjawz and Disciples of Tzeentch.

Has anyone got a light?
It's All-Skype Fight Night!

Friday, 2 June 2017

EXT: Industrial Sector


Future scenery! Just in time for Newty K.

Thursday, 1 June 2017

Kairic Rolled

Due to the machinations of their arch-rival, Nurgle (i.e. an outbreak of chickenpox), these guys didn't get painted fast enough to attend WoffBoot XI.

Kairic Acolytes for Tzeentch Arcanites, Warhammer Age of Sigmar

But they have a battle coming up this week, and while they have a reputation of being expensive Marauders with a shooting option, I'm never gonna to give them up, nor let them down.

Wednesday, 31 May 2017

Warlord of Galahir: Knock Knock

Fresh from our success in Dwarf King's Quest, we return to our Warlord of Galahir campaign.


Our next mission: rescue Pietor the Merchant!

(my secondary mission: paint up a model to represent Pietor the Merchant)

(And the doors. Right?)

Monday, 29 May 2017

Dwarf King's Quest: The Last Word

The battle reports are done, but we still haven't tapped out the well of WoffBoot XI

I apologise for the nature of these photographs. The hour was late, and there may have been beers.

With all the players in the same country for once, we finally play the epic conclusion to Dwarf King's Quest: Only One Gets Out Alive!

Sunday, 28 May 2017

WoffBoot XI: Disciples of Tzeentch vs Nighthaunt

My fifth and final game of the WoffBoot. I'm out of the top positions for sure, but a win might just nudge me over the halfway mark


Standing in my way: ghosties and ghoulies and a long-armed beastie - the Nighthaunts have come out to play!

Saturday, 27 May 2017

WoffBoot XI: Disciples of Tzeentch vs Stormcast Eternals (again!)

Four games into the WoffBoot tournament, and my winning streak went down the Escalation escalator.



But here comes a chance at redemption - a Border War scenario against another Stormcast army!

Friday, 26 May 2017

WoffBoot XI: Disciples of Tzeentch vs Ironjawz

Game 3 and my coalition of chaos faces an Ironjawz army.


Specifically, it's my Ironjawz army, so how could I go wrong?

Thursday, 25 May 2017

WoffBoot XI: Disciples of Tzeentch vs Stormcast Eternals

A new dawn rises over the WoffBoot, and I play my second game of the tournament.

Age of Sigmar Battle Report: "Blood And Glory" - Disciples of Tzeentch vs Stormcast Eternals.

I take on the good guys in Blood And Glory: here come the Stormcast!

Wednesday, 24 May 2017

WoffBoot XI: Disciples of Tzeentch vs Nurgle Rotbringers

The dust settles on another WoffBoot, and while the results are there for all to see, that doesn't tell the whole story. So settle in for the first of my five battle reports.

Age of Sigmar Battle Report: "Take And Hold" - Disciples of Tzeentch vs Nurgle Rotbringers.

It's a Tzeentch vs Nurgle grudge match!

Tuesday, 23 May 2017

General Kraken Licks His Wounds



Image result for disastrous battles

My Woffboot XI - let's just make it clear now, that if you're looking for tales of derring do and splendour in battle, you won't be finding them here.

Monday, 22 May 2017

ArchaOne for the Road


On my way to this year's 'Boot, I had some spare time at the airport. So I thought 'why not get some painting done?'

Sunday, 21 May 2017

WoffBoot XI

The annual tourney is over, and the results are in: “Only the Faithful!”

Vs SCE1
Vs Nh
Vs Irn
Vs DoT
Vs SCE2
Vs NR
TOTAL
-
#1
(major)
#5
(major)
#2
(loss)
#4
(major)
#3
(major)
8
#1
(loss)
-
#4
(major)
#5
(major)
#3
(major)
#2
(minor)
7
#5
(loss)
#4
(loss)
-
#1
(major)
#4
(major)
6
#2
(minor)
#5
(loss)
#3
(loss)
-
#1
(minor)
4
#4
(loss)
#3
(loss)
#1
(loss)
#4
(loss)
-
#5
(major)
2
#3
(loss)
#2
(loss)
#4
(loss)
#1
(loss)
#5
(loss)
-
0

Scenarios

  1. Take and Hold
  2. Blood and Glory
  3. Escalation
  4. Border War
  5. Gifts from the Heavens

Thursday, 18 May 2017

Swirly, Curly, Glowy, Killme

The Silver Tower is a maze of madness, a seemingly-endless journey into mind-boiling insanity...

Ogroid Thaumaturge, Warhammer Quest Silver Tower and Warhammer Age of Sigmar.

And to replicate the experience, GW have kindly given us the Ogroid Thaumaturge!

Wednesday, 17 May 2017

Gork, Mork and Pork!

We've had Chaos for the last few updates, but there's still one more Ironjawz unit to get battle-ready.

Ironjawz Gore-Grunta with pig iron choppa for Warhammer Age of Sigmar
Gore-Gruntas! 

Even in Age of Sigmar, I can't kick the pig habit.

Tuesday, 16 May 2017

The Future's not Orange


You must have heard by now. There's a new 40K coming.

Chimera! (not the troop carrier)

I continue my 2017 monster mash (2 down, 3 to go) with the mish-mashiest of them all - the Chimera!

Chimera, Chaos Monster, Warhammer Age of Sigmar
"What do you mean?! - You snore! - Oh I don't- anyway, you have bad breath! -
Because you never brush my teeth! - Oh, stop quickly, let's have a cup of tea!"

Which it not, as I once thought, pronounced 'Shim-era'. It is actually 'Ky-mere-ah', and so would more helpfully start with a 'K'. Actually, being a classical Greek monster, it doesn't even start with a 'C', but with the letter 'Chi', which is really the letter 'X'.

Classic Greek is confusing. No wonder Gerald Butler seemed so angry.

Monday, 15 May 2017

Yellow Brick Foes

In all of our Skype battles, I'll bet that Chaos Warriors get proxied more than any other unit. Well - no more!

Slaves to Darkness Chaos Warrior, Warhammer Age of Sigmar

Let's take at look at these models that I'm sure you've never seen before!*

*on rounds

Sunday, 14 May 2017

'Core Unit


Fielding Warriors of Chaos is rather like leading the Labour Party. There's always problems with the leadership.

Saturday, 13 May 2017

A Shaman And His 'Spolding Staff

The Weirdnob Shaman - I finally get to paint an Ironjaw without any old iron!

Oh, I wouldn't give ya tuppence for ya old watch chain...

Waaagh! are we waiting for?

Friday, 12 May 2017

Et Tu Brute

The Ironjawz Waaagh! continues apace, and I can tick the second unit of Brutes from my checklist.

Ironjawz Brute with jagged gore-hacka
Check, mate

Thursday, 11 May 2017

All Aboard The Megaboss

With little more than a week until WoffBoot XI, I'd better get cracking and finish at least one of the two armies I'm bringing.

Let's start with the Megaboss!

Shut up Google Images, you know what I mean.


Monday, 8 May 2017

Cold Northern Warbands

The North has Risen Again!

Thursday, 4 May 2017

Night Night


The Crypt Angels have been feeling neglected.


Saturday, 29 April 2017

Brute Force

Look at what my family got me for Christmas!

Translation: look at what I bought for myself once I'd returned all my presents

These very welcome and short-lived Battleforce bundles from Games Workshop are jaw-droppingly good value. If they repeated this exercise, I'd be in serious danger of buying one each year.

Let's get started: Big Wunz Iz Da Best!

Saturday, 22 April 2017

Any Old Iron: Ironjawz vs Disciples of Tzeentch

Bulla, Megaboss of Da Flat Iron Clan and warlord of Da Wasted Plains, gave a hard stare to the stone icon, then headbutted it. He didn't like the way that vulture head was looking at him, so he smashed his forehead into it for a second time. The stone was starting to crumble. Good, he thought. Gork damn him if he was going to take any cheek from a statue.

"Dey are coming for it," said his Warchanter, Groll, tapping out his two stikks while he spoke. They had not reached the ear-bursting beat of battle, but the gods-infused stikks were knocking out an impatient tempo. Every heartbeat brought them closer to slaughter.

"Da humies?" Bulla asked. His outriders had seen a large mob of chaos-worshippers drawing close, dragging a large casket of loot behind them.

Groll nodded at the cracked icon. "Dey want dis one, and the one on the uvver side of town."

Bulla thumped his meaty fist against his breastplate. A shower of rust flaked away, but there were still many inches of pig-iron covering several more inches of thick Orruk muscle. "Get da ladz. We'll pull 'em into our jawz, den crush 'em."

The Warchanter gave both Gorkskikk and Morkstikk a determined bash, igniting the green Waaagh! power within. "It's gonna be an 'ard day's night."


Age of Sigmar battle report: 'Take And Hold' between Orruk Ironjawz and Disciples of Tzeentch.

Melt down the ferrite!
It's All-Skype Fight Night!


The Ark of Alternatives campaign continues apace (that pace being once a month). This time, I Stylus, will be bringing a new faction to play, hastily painted up during the bank holiday: the Ironjawz!

Sunday, 16 April 2017

Final Level

Well, that didn't take long.

Something like 16 months from delivery to shelf. These guys were still alive when it arrived, and now look at them.

Friday, 14 April 2017

Warlord of Galahir: Bouncers Back

We got puréed in our last encounter with The Bouncers, but if first you don't succeed ... blame the questbook and generate some more effective dungeoneers!


Behold, two new-and-improved heroes, ready to re-try the mission!

Thursday, 13 April 2017

Gorechosen: Anger Management

It's been a few months since I rushed through sufficient basecoats to play Gorechosen with my family at Christmas (and got my anvil handed to me), but I've finally finished off the Red Hand Gang.

Gorechosen
Imagine this walk in slow-motion and it would be AWESOME.

Let's meet the Fab Four!

Wednesday, 12 April 2017

It Will Not Die


Image result for mystery

So before you head on past the page break, see if you can guess what I've been painting this week. Go on, pick something. I feel confident I can surprise you.

Tuesday, 11 April 2017

Quadroplegia

Finally! The Quadjumper is here!

Image result for quadjumper explodes
Let's use it to escape!

Monday, 10 April 2017

Mini Star Destroyer

Image result for mini star destroyer

A long time ago in a galaxy skype skype away...

Wednesday, 5 April 2017

One Man And His Bird-Dog

So after a year of painting the miniatures (okay, painting half the miniatures, don't look at me like that, leadpile), I finally got in my first game of Warhammer Quest: Silver Tower.

Gryph-Hound from Warhammer Quest: Silver Tower.

I had a blast, and was immediately inspired to pluck one of the heroes from the unpainted stack

(don't worry, it's not just the Gryph-Hound)

Tuesday, 4 April 2017

They Won't Stay Dead

Guess Whose Back?
When there's no more room in hell, my lead pile will walk the Earth.

Monday, 3 April 2017

The Birdmen of Silvatowaz

I may have been too slow for Tzaanuary, so let's pretend my deadline was for the start of Tzaapril!

Tzaangor from Warhammer Quest: Silver Tower, Age of Sigmar

Let's crack on with these blue meanies!